DANCING On Ice pro Alex Murphy has broken down in tears after sharing her “hellish” fertility battle.
The 37-year-old and husband Paul Klein, aka one half of YouTuber duo Woody & Kleiny, have been trying to conceive for two years.
And while they've undergone numerous tests to find out why they haven't been successful, they ended up finding “nothing” – which Alex said is almost worse than finding something that can be fixed.
She appeared on Amy Hart's Mum's Club podcast earlier this month talking about their attempts to fall pregnant, as she said: “It wasn't a thing to me that I would have a time limit, but then when you start trying to conceive, all of a sudden everybody talks about the time limit, and you're like ‘Oh my God'.
“We started trying when I was 35, I hit 37 and I wanted to drive my car off a cliff.”
Alex added she feels “embarrassed” that her “body's not working”, but still has “so much faith it's going to happen”.
She then further opened up in a video on her TikTok page, sobbing as she recalled an incident that had “derailed” her entire day.
“I walk into town and this woman, who meant no harm by this in any way, shape, or form, comes up to me and she's like, ‘Alex, so good to see you, how are you?',” she said.
“She gives me a hug, goes, ‘Haven't seen you in a while', grabs my belly, touches my stomach, and goes, ‘No babies yet?'
“If I can give anyone a piece of advice, I don't care if you're a mum or a daughter or a granddaughter or a sister, do not go up to someone and talk about pregnancy.
“I don't care if they look nine months pregnant, don't talk to them about their pregnancy.
“Do not ever ask them if they're pregnant, do not ever ask them why there's no babies, don't ever ask them anything.
A Miracle Baby Story
“Shut up and don't say anything.”
Alex said she had to sit there and grit her teeth as she said “No, none yet”.
“I am going through torture with my husband at this point, we are going through hell,” she continued.
“And this is the stuff that happens to me on a weekly basis – this is why I couldn't get away with hiding it from people anymore.
“This is why, I would never go up to someone and touch their stomach.”
And while she insisted she knows the woman “meant nothing by it”, she couldn't help get upset by her comment.
Why being the child-free friend isn’t as easy as everyone thinks
By Josie Griffiths, deputy digital Fabulous editor.
Josie Griffiths said: We get it, having kids is exhausting.
And yes, there are loads of benefits to not having them – weekend lie-ins, more disposable income, freedom to make your holidays all about you – which trust me I am aware of.
But as all your friends and family members start becoming parents, the truth is it’s not THAT easy being the one who hasn’t taken the plunge.
My girlfriends regularly tell me how their annual leaving is clogged up by parents calling first dibs on the entire summer, or fret that close mates won’t come to their wedding now they’re parents.
It’s not unfounded either, we had five friends, including one my husband was best man for before he started a family, drop out of our wedding citing sick kids and other child-related issues.
The truth is that once people have babies, life becomes all about them.
And while those babies are of course lovely and we dedicate many weekends to visiting them, there is sometimes a gnawing thought in the back of my mind, that we have become second-class citizens.
Not only are you the one constantly expected to adapt and evolve to children’s nap times and swimming lessons, but the things you care most about suddenly become “frivolous”, met with an eye roll and a “must be nice”.
As someone who really wants children myself, I hope this is a short-term pain, but if we experienced any sort of fertility issues I know this would be made 100 times harder.
I have friends who are in that position, and my heart breaks for them.
And I also have female friends who’ve decided not to have children, for very well-considered and thought out reasons, who shouldn’t ever be made to feel like their lives aren’t as important as anyone else’s.
When it comes to people who are child-free by choice, we all need to learn to celebrate their wins more – whether it's renting their own flat on one income, getting the promotion, or taking a sabbatical to travel the world.
But there are downsides too, they’re just whispered over glasses of wine in restaurants and shared in private WhatsApp chats, instead of being plastered all over social media.
“Don't touch someone, don't ever touch their stomach, don't ever insinuate anything about getting pregnant, don't ever insinuate anything about babies,” she said.
“She has fully derailed my entire day.
“I was having a really good day, I was feeling really good and really positive about everything, we had gotten some hope, we had a really good call with the doctor last night, and that has derailed my entire f**king afternoon.
“And now I have to go home and pull my s**t together again and ultimately just try not to think about this because I'm tired.”
Alex admitted she's felt like she needed to share their fertility struggle publicly, because if she doesn't she's “going to completely combust”.
“And if one more person comes up to me and touches my stomach, I'm going to slap them,” she sighed.
“And that's not like me. I'm not aggressive.
“I'm trying my best to keep my s**t together as best I can.
“But the thing with being in the public eye, people thinking they're entitled to knowing you and that I can't deal with anymore.
“So it's out in the open.
“We are struggling. We have some hope but my whole f**king afternoon is ruined because of this now.
“It's literally ruined my whole afternoon and now I have to sit here and cry in my car and try to get my s**t together and not feel like I want to drive my car off a f**king cliff.”
I am going through torture with my husband at this point, we are going through hell
Alex Murphy
She concluded by begging: “Please be better to the people around you. Please be better.
“Be more cognitive. Be more aware and never touch somebody's stomach – whether they're pregnant or not.”
She added in the video caption: “Ladies, we have to do better. This is about the 10th time this has happened to me in the public with someone coming up to me and touching me and openly talking about this as if they have any right to know.
“Now I know this wasn’t done with any bad intent, but it has got to stop.”
“Aww Alex, this is heartbreaking to watch,” one person wrote in the comments section.
“I can’t believe someone, anyone, thinks that’s ok to say to anyone.”
“That is not acceptable on any level…. some people are just insensitive, please don't let one person ruin your day,” another said.
“I felt every word of this,” a third admitted.
“I get this from family and friends regularly, despite them knowing my struggles.”
